The three cognitive texts that subtly govern our lives
The three cognitive texts that subtly govern our lives
By Anne-Laure Le Cunff | Published: 2025-03-04 15:30:00 | Source: Smart Skills – Big Think
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In 1979 He studiesCognitive scientists discovered something strange: When participants were asked to describe their everyday experiences — going to the doctor, eating at a restaurant — they gave almost identical responses. They followed the same sequences, incorporated the same steps, and expected the same results.
Since then, research has revealed that these patterns extend beyond everyday activities. We rely on deeply ingrained “cognitive scripts” not only in daily routines but also in shaping our careers, relationships, and identities. While they can provide comfort, they also prevent us from reaching our full potential.
Compatibility with texts that are not ours
One of the most common cognitive texts is the supplementary text – The assumption that the next chapter of our lives should logically follow the last. We stick to careers we no longer enjoy, we stay in relationships that no longer serve us, and we avoid exploring opportunities that seem inconsistent with our identity. This self-consistency fallacy stems from our brains’ preference for familiar stories — stories that make sense and offer guidance, reassuring us that we’re on the right path.
Another script that subtly governs our behavior is the Crowdpleaser script. The pressure to conform to social expectations is strong, and is often disguised as prudence or wisdom. From an early age, we internalize socially sacred milestones—educational achievements, career ladders, and relationship timelines. The desire to be validated by peers and family prevents many from taking unconventional paths, even when those paths are more aligned with our own definition of success (think of someone staying in a career they don’t enjoy just to meet family expectations).
The third is the epic text, which is the belief that life should revolve around one great goal. The idea is tempting: find “the one thing” that matters to us and dedicate our lives to it. yet research He points out that this thinking is flawed. Many people who chase one passion are disappointed when they encounter setbacks, assuming they chose a mistake rather than a course correction. Others feel lost when they fail to set a specific goal at all. The truth is that most people are multi-potential, curious and sophisticated beings with diverse interests. Embracing this fluidity can lead to a more fulfilling life.
How to break free from cognitive texts
Cognitive scripts provide useful structure, especially for routine activities, but they should not determine the course of our lives. Recognizing these invisible but ever-present cognitive scripts is the first step to breaking free from them. The key is not a radical overhaul, but a mental shift – replacing rigid expectations with fixed ones Experimental mentality. By allowing ourselves to experience new possibilities without the pressure of a fixed outcome, we open the door to a more compatible lifestyle.
One of the most effective ways to disrupt a cognitive text is to question its origins. Were there certain expectations learned by the family, reinforced by the culture, or imposed on itself based on outdated beliefs? By examining our most obvious and seemingly natural aspirations, we can separate inherited influences from what really matters to us.
To uncover the complementary scenario, someone might ask: Am I applying for this job because I can learn and grow or because it “makes sense” based on my previous job? For the Crowdpleaser scenario: Am I seeking this professional accomplishment for myself or because I hope it will please others? For the epic scenario: Do I dedicate myself to this endeavor because it truly aligns with my interests or because I feel pressured to find my purpose?
Big changes in life are scary, which is why many people stay attached to reassuring texts. One powerful way to get rid of them is through small, low-risk experiments. Instead of leaving a long-term career overnight, try freelancing in a new field or taking a training course. Instead of committing to a life-changing move, spend a few weeks in a different city. Experiencing new ways of being allows for gradual transformations without the pressure of an all-or-nothing decision.
Cognitive scripts often come with predetermined measures of success: promotions, financial milestones, and social recognition. But these standards can be strict and restrictive. What if success wasn’t about achieving traditional milestones, but rather about lifelong curiosity, change, and growth?
Breaking free from cognitive scripts is about unlearning what we have been taught to expect of ourselves. It’s about loosening our grip on the narratives we’ve internalized and letting go of the need for certainty and the default lens of traditional achievement. It requires the courage to question established narratives, experiment with new possibilities, and redefine success on our terms. When we adopt this experimental mindset, we allow ourselves to build lives that align with our evolving ambitions.
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