Today’s kids will never understand the fun of a 90s weekend activity
By Robert Scucci | Published: 2025-10-28 19:51:00 | Source: GIANT FREAKIN ROBOT
Written by Robert Scocchi | Published
Confession time: I’m addicted to streaming. My favorite platform is Tubi because it reminds me of the good old days when I would venture out on physical media rentals, looking for the most disruptive films in the process when big budget films sold out.
In the late 1990s and early 2000s, most of my physical media rentals were from family stores that were always next to a tanning salon. My dad thought Blockbuster was run by criminals because of the late fees that were clearly stated in the lease, so we didn’t go there. When I turned 18, I finally opened my own account, and all bets were off.
But before that, I discovered loopholes. I signed up for a place called Video Haven, even though I wasn’t old enough to rent R-rated movies. Fortunately, my older sister’s friend worked there and let me rent physical media at her expense. My parents didn’t care what I watched, but I had to be strategic if I wanted to watch anything above a PG-13 rating.
Logistics aside, I’m really upset that kids today will never understand the joy and slight fear that sometimes comes with renting physical media.
The luck of the draw, and the thrill of the hunt
The best part of renting physical media is the grab bag unpredictability that you don’t get with streaming. My friends and I would wander the aisles forever, looking first at the new releases, then the strange things that looked like they shouldn’t be there.
The staff picks section was always going to be the jackpot. Those were the esoteric nicknames imposed on customers by employees who had lost their minds from watching Con Air, Rush hourand toy story A thousand times. They wanted someone else to experience the strange gems they found while zoning out during slow shifts. This is where I found indie films and weird stuff like B movies ByeWhich most people completely ignore.
There was always danger. The money I made from my part-time job was on the line, and five dollars meant something, because you couldn’t immediately switch to something else like you can today. Because of this, I’ve learned to find entertainment value in everything. That’s how I discovered horror comedies Blood Feast 2: All You Can Eatfever dream experiences such as Forbidden zoneand underrated action flicks like Black dog.
You never knew what you were getting. Once you discover your taste, your memory works like a primitive algorithm. You didn’t Google anything. You just recognized the director’s name or a strange DVD/VHS cover you’d seen before and jumped at the chance.
Also, if you don’t rewind, you risk getting an angry voicemail. Depending on who was working that night, his tone ranged from mild annoyance to outright anger.
Something was really at stake
When my friends and I were searching for the most disturbing movies possible to augment our foggy weekends, we would rent physical media for a purpose. Someone has heard Pink flamingos The border strip was unobservable, so of course we rented it. We gagged, laughed, and then roasted whoever chose it as if it were a sanctioned sport.
There was a strategy. Whoever paid the money made the final decision. Whoever picked too many clunkers lost their picking privileges until they redeemed themselves by finally recommending a score for consideration.
Once we turned eighteen, we finally crossed the beaded curtain. I’m not saying everyone needs to watch Faces of deathBut I can say it leads to some memorable conversations. One time, just for a scene, we rented it Piratesthe most expensive porn film ever made at the time, complete with terrible acting and lines like, “Last night, I dreamed that my plane was a three-masted Spanish galleon!”
I doubt Johnny Depp or Keira Knightley knew this parody existed, but I’m glad it exists. I quote that line to this day because it’s not out of my pocket.
The secret of tanning beds
When streaming took over, physical media rentals began to disappear quickly. Netflix’s mail order form was the beginning of the end. And yes, the tanning salon next door to the video store was really a business model.
Mom-and-pop stores often ran both. The tanner made money during the day, and the renters made money at night. They were not suspected fronts for money laundering, as we assumed. They’ve been getting creative with their membership models to keep the lights on.
You can still rent physical media
You can still rent physical media if you look hard enough. Some places rent DVDs, VHS tapes, video games, audiobooks, and even board games. When I lived in Connecticut, I frequented the best video and culture center in Hamden. I rented until I moved in 2017. At the time, the place was huge. Entire lanes are dedicated to specific managers. Staff choices stretch endlessly along the walls. Now, it’s smaller, but still active as a video store, café, and music venue. There’s no tanning bed nearby, and he’s still putting up the good fight.
Unlike Blockbuster, which refused to focus on streaming until it was too late, independently operated rental stores survive because they adapt. Many of them are operated by owners who are legally interested in the films. They will add addresses if you request them.
Places like this are rare, but they do exist. Any younger movie fan owes it to themselves to rent physical media at least once to experience the magic.
Race the clock to avoid late fees. Talk to the staff. You wander the aisles without knowing what you are looking for. This is the part I miss the most. Browsing. Commitment. Danger.
Sometimes the catch was better than the movie itself, and that was the point.
(tags for translation) Black Dog
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